When I first got the call telling me I had been selected as the Grand Marshal for Elmhurst’s 101st Memorial Day Parade, I had to sit down. Not because I was overwhelmed, though I was, but because moments like that make you stop, breathe, and remember exactly why service matters.

I’ve carried a lot of titles in my life: Captain, Commander, Coach, Professor, Mom. But Grand Marshal… that one hit differently. It wasn’t about rank. It wasn’t about achievement. It was about representing a community I love and honoring the men and women who paid the ultimate price for the freedoms we enjoy. And as I soon learned, I was the first woman in this parade’s long history to carry that honor.

I was humbled. Deeply.

Walking the Streets With the Weight of Memories

As the parade stepped off that May morning, the energy flowed through Elmhurst like electricity. Kids waved tiny flags. Veterans saluted. Families held signs with names of loved ones who never came home. People weren’t just spectators, they were participants in remembrance.

Riding at the front, I felt the weight of their eyes and their trust. I wasn’t just Lori from down the street. I was Captain Lori Tompos, Desert Storm and Gulf War veteran, carrying the stories of soldiers whose names will never leave my heart.

I didn’t feel alone. I felt surrounded by my soldiers, my mentors, my brothers and sisters in arms. Leadership doesn’t disappear when the uniform comes off; it evolves. And that day, leadership meant honoring them with every wave, every nod, every moment of presence.

How Service Shaped Me – and Still Does

My journey to that parade began long before I ever stepped onto those streets of Elmhurst. I was among the first 800 women to graduate from West Point, a fact that still gives me goosebumps when I say it. I didn’t choose the easy path. I chose Air Defense Artillery, a Combat Arms branch at a time when very few women dared to cross that line.

And then I found myself deployed to the Gulf, the first from my unit and Brigade to arrive, carrying a classified mission and leading an advanced party of infantrymen whose sole job was to protect me while I established a PATRIOT Missile site. Imagine being in your twenties and standing in the desert with 11 infantry soldiers staring at you, waiting for your direction.

That will test your leadership.
That will show you who you really are.

Later, I was one of only a handful of officers certified to run the PATRIOT system. I led the day shift, 150 soldiers tasked with defending an airbase and members of the Saudi Royal family. It was high pressure. High stakes. And as a woman in that environment, there were moments where I couldn’t even speak directly to some of the people we worked with. Couldn’t even look them in the eye.

But you learn to lead anyway.
You learn to adapt.
You learn that influence doesn’t always need a voice, sometimes your actions do the talking.

People often ask me where my leadership style comes from. I tell them the truth: it’s a gift from God, sharpened by training, strengthened in the desert, and perfected through years of leading teams in the military and corporate worlds.

Life After the Uniform

My military journey didn’t end when I hung up my active-duty boots. I continued serving in the Army Reserves. I pursued my Master of Education at Ohio University. I taught MBA courses on leadership, change, and organizational management. At Accenture, I guided teams through change management and project training.

And eventually, I founded Avail Consulting, the place where all my passions intersect: people, leadership, growth, and purpose.

For the last two decades, I’ve had the privilege of coaching leaders, guiding teams, and standing on stages across the country, even the TEDx stage, to share what service taught me about courage, humility, and human connection.

But that day, rolling through Elmhurst as the Grand Marshal, I wasn’t the consultant or the speaker or the professor. I was simply a soldier who loves her country and her community.

The Heart of a Veteran, the Soul of a Leader

What made that parade so special wasn’t the title, it was the people lining the streets. It was the quiet salute from an old Marine whose eyes told a story I instantly understood. It was the little girl in a red-white-and-blue dress who shouted, “Thank you!” as though I had personally protected her future.

It was standing beside my husband, Stephen, also an Army veteran, and knowing our children were watching not just a parade, but a legacy of service.

Elmhurst has been my home for more than 15 years. I’ve coached here, taught here, volunteered here, raised my kids here. To be chosen to represent this community on Memorial Day… that was one of the greatest honors of my life.

Why This Moment Matters

Memorial Day isn’t about celebration, it’s about gratitude. It’s about leadership in its purest form: service before self. It’s the reminder that every freedom we enjoy was purchased by someone’s courage.

Standing at the front of that parade reminded me why I do the work I do today. Leadership is not a title. It’s not a rank. It’s not authority.

Leadership is influence.
Leadership is service.
Leadership is sacrifice.
Leadership is love in action.

And I will forever be grateful that on that day, in that moment, the community I love entrusted me with the honor of leading from the front.